A magical day today. After much procrastination and a million reasons (excuses) why I couldn’t,  I finally got to go walking. Walking the fields around my home. My long awaited home in the country – the place I dreamed of that would help me connect with my natural world. I walked to ‘my’ oak trees. Past the cows peacefully pasturing, multicoloured, gentle, enjoying chewing the cud. Over the depleted river Stour, only slightly raised after yesterday’s heavy rain. The oak trees were just ‘there’. Just being. Such energy to exchange with these magnificent trees. Not thoughts, just something, inexplicable, happening in my hands as I touched the trunk of each tree, communed with each one something wordless, beyond my conscious understanding.

Then the magic of discovering a horse in the field. I’ve never really connected with horses before but something beautiful happened. The horse wanted to be with me and I felt such love, such oneness. It felt like an affirmation of how far I’ve come in my journey of self discovery – that I could be present enough for a horse to feel totally comfortable with me, a stranger – touching,  kissing, exploring the warmth and strength of such a magnificent beast. It felt like a mutually healing experience.

Later, back in my orchard, watching the sun set, noticing the start of autumn and the rare warm evening, connecting with my own trees, I realised the importance of appreciating the beauty of this existence. All too easily I could focus on the insects, the drone of the sewage pump or the sound of traffic in the far distance. But I chose to notice the call of the bird in the tree above me. The scent of the grass, the roses, the beautiful aroma of dusk after rain. The gentle baaing of the sheep, neighing of horses. And my very special healing cat Disco purring and chirruping in my arms.

Finally, I find home. Inside me.